archives (by month):
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2007: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2006: feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2007: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2006: feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap Hey. Nurse. Hey...Can you shave my baby? It creeps me out when they come with hair.

Welcome to Asperger King Your extremely specific fast food order is our mumble mumble.

Out of my way, slow-tards! I've got some pavement to smear.

Bobby, I'm seeing some marks on the inside of your truth tooth. Did you do anything bad in the past six months? Let me take a closer look. Oh, my. Have you told a lie to anyone? I'm going to have to polish this out so your mother doesn't see. She's going to be really mad if she notices! It's going to be expensive to get you out of trouble, Bobby. .. do you have anything to kick in? Maybe some Pokemon cards? 1700 plus Pokemon Trading Cards Mint condition

Still nothing... bah! I'm starting to think this Rachael Ray Home Dead Revival Kit is full of shit.

Halt! State your name and your business! Braden, say your rap. Braden, do it! My naaaame, is Ol Dirty Bas' My gaaaame, is to kick your ass Dun dun dun dun dun dun Dun dun old lady is weird

Open your mouth... thank you! I'll just check your -- oh, dude, you have a pube in your teeth.

Your dog will be fine, ma'am. I'm palpating his digestive tract, and it sounds like he ate some ceramic insulation. Have you left him unattended recently? Like, maybe...in the same room as a space shuttle?

Oh, great job, dick. You fished me. What are you gonna do now? Put me in your truck and drive back home?

You know what, dude? I gotta come clean. We aren't really gonna raft down the Mississippi like I said. Up there, in that stand of trees to the left, is a nice ol' lady who's gonna show you all about women. All you have to do is lay back and relax. Your mom was against the idea, of course, on account of her gettin' red in the stretchmarks every time I even say the word "prostitute." You should have heard her. Blah blah nine isn't old enough blah blah prostitute blah blah hot flashes.

Built in 1822 by the enterprising Henry O'Sullivan, the Cincinnati Horsubway ran its first and only car for just a single day, on April 25. Riders complained bitterly about the slow amble of the horses, especially through the unlit horsubway tunnels. At four o'clock that afternoon, a group of enraged passengers rushed the Horsubway cab with torches, ending its service after only six hours.

Keep digging, Bruno... there are more dogs where these came from.

This test will determine which classes you will take during the next three years of high school, and will more or less define your social circle until you leave this building. Begin the test.... now.

"Daddy! Cam we stop over there? I have to express my humors!" "Goddamnit, NO, Frances. How many times I told you I only stop at Shell feed stations? Those Sunoco horse-stops are full of shit."

Shit, my glasses are in the truck... is tat 62014... or 82014? Ah, dammit. I'm gonna go with 82014. Oh, look who's home. It's Mr. Long Showers. Well, guess what. Our water bill was four grand this month.

It doesn't get much cooler than this! Unless you include cars

Excuse me! Miss! With the papers! Can you move a little bit to the left? Left... no, my left. Your right. I need to survey that ass.

Drawing this comic is awesome! I can't wait until the syndicate gets their hands on this and squeezes out all the humor.

My degree enabled me to begin my ccareer path four years later than my peers! Look, I'm still here on the bottom rung! Woooooo! Thanks, college!

Listen, Michael... I don't wanna tell you what to do... but, honestly. Your boss is full of shit. Wouldn't you be a lot happier if you quit? If you get bored during the day, you can always come here. Me and Yellow Tail are never going to get on your case like that.

We made that! Don't drop it! Noooo! Our stone circle! COME ON, DUDE And the mighty angel took up the villager's stone, and hearing not their cries, cast the great artifact into the river. "This is about as big as that dump I took the other day, that I told you guys about, in that revelation." The massive stone sank to the bottom of the river. "Heh.... splish." And so the villagers were illuminated.

"Make this dark section a little bigger. It'll look better." "But... the data doesn't support that! The graph will be wrong!" "Let's try this again. I'm the president and you're the Food & Drug Administration. Change. The. Graph. Now."

Fishes ain't shit but roe and fish

This is your captain speaking. Next stop is whenever. Just be like, "stop."

Common strokes used in swimming Breaststroke: The swimmer is oriented face-down in the water. Scissor kicks propel the swimmer forward. Face is below the surface of the water. Backstroke: The swimmer is oriented face-up. Arms follow a semi-circular movement. The swimmer's face is above water. Soulja Boy: The swimmer makes frequent reference to ejaculating on a whore's back. Arms follow predetermined pattern.

She takes it to the wall... dodges left... spins right... pastes... it looks good... YES! Nothin' but floral borders!

Aloha and welcome to Hawaii! Here's something made in China!

Pull those muffins out... careful... there you go! Set them on the counter to cool. Now keep doing this every day for a man who doesn't love you, and you can grow up to be just like Mommy!

archives (by month):
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2007: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2006: feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2007: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2006: feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec







