Married To The Sea archives (by month):
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2007: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2006: feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2007: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2006: feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
What happened to Jamestown? #2 fig. 1. Poor design. The town's monorail had a top speed of 0.4 mph, and it fell off the track once a day, on average.

Let him--Grandpa! Let him lick you! I gave the bear an ether bath this morning, so he's clean.

And you'll do as we say, or you'll join those two skeletons in the corner. BE COOL MAN BEING A SKELETON SUCKS

MISSED CONNECTIONS You: Whoever Me: Under this sign When: Now

I read what you said in your blog about "that shit-fuck train conductor"! You get off my train! Take your hands off my husband, you shit-fuck!

Mom! It wasn't me! It was my parasitic twin.

I'M SORRY! EVERYONE! I'M SORRY! IT WAS MT FAULT! I WAS MASTURbating!

Oh! That's the third thumb this week.

Here you are ma'am, compliments of the conductor. BALL SWEAT

Hey, I mowed the lawn 2,098 times before I kicked off! That's pretty good! Ain't nobody gonna say I never did nothin' now. What other kinda trivia do you have in that book? No, I don't think I want you to read me the chapter called "Mistakes." Come on, no. Aw, shit, come on, dude. That's like two inches thick. Man. I should have known this Hell Trivia thing was a scam.

Yeah, just make a blog post, and list off what you think I did today. It's pretty easy. Oh, and set my mood to quixotic. All right. Quixotic. What album...no? No album? Okay, no album. Dude. The pharaoh is totally fucking with him. I heard the pharaoh listening to Sublime or some shit on the way over here.

FREE COOKIES 10:00 A.M. @ VALLEY FORGE Oh, hell yes! I'm totally not doing anything at 10 today. Well, anything that's not eating some free cookies.

You can't believe I don't like Star Wars? I think what you meant to say was "Hey, Elijah, I was under the understanding that you had shitty taste in movies."

Ha! Ha! That's wonderful, Isaac! Let me tell you one now. Okay... How do you convince a woman to lie in a puddle of semen for twenty minutes? I don't know. How? Tell her it will increase her chances of conception.

Bad dreams Good people can have bad dreams, but it is incredibly rare.

You... Little girl! You look nothing like your Myspace picture! This had better not be a fucking sting.

NAH, NOTHIN'S HAPPENING. WELL, MY LEG IS WET, BUT OTHERWISE, NO How does that feel? Are you regaining your humors?

My celebrity look-alikes Nobody fucking cares

No, you get back here RIGHT NOW YOUNG MAN. Did you seriously just fucking call me Miss Cleo?

CUSTOM RIM JOBS 5 cents ?

Rectal prolapse: $5 Putting it back in: $10

Looks like it's just you and me here, Duke. Say...do you mind if I j/o?

Hello...this is the operator. You have a call from...my butt.

Ghost Orchestra "Wish I'd Signed Up For Ghost Marching Band, Then I'd At Least Be Getting Ghost Fingerbanged"

I HAVE NEVER SEEN SUCH A TATTOO BEFORE. TELL ME, DID THIS TATTOO HURT Yes.

Bloggers were invented ca. 300 AD, and were originally called "monks". Like their distant descendents, monks had shitty haircuts, and never got laid.

Excuse me, miss...I don't mean to be a bother, but your circles are simply lovely. It's hard to find a girl who appreciates a good circle these days.

this is where my fingers went

I'm sorry, folks, the engine's not starting. I don't know what it could be... I've got all the controls set right... The only... -! Gentlemen, I'm terribly sorry, but the engine won't work if someone who has contracted pubic lice boards the car. The man who has the lice needs to disembark now, or I'll have you leave one-by-one. No one? Okay, then, you at the end. Beardy. You hop off and I'll try starting this engine without you. If it's not you, let's alternate, so Beardy 2, you're next.

Angelz up, English horns down! You heard.

Married To The Sea archives (by month):
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2007: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2006: feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2007: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2006: feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec






